July 1, 2019, Monday morning and my first day back to life and reality after 2 weeks away with Army National Guard. I was relieved to be home and getting back to my real life when an email popped into my inbox, "Maah Daah Hey LOA". I was initially just saddened to realize I'd been chosen to go to North Dakota in 24 days to run and represent the Army National Guard team simply because I wasn't ready to think about leaving again already and also because it's been months since I'd been able to train well due to ongoing hamstring, back and pelvic pain, so the thought of running a fast marathon sounded excruciating (my inner self was already imagining the pain). Then I remembered that this was one of my top choices for the years' races and hello...not simply a road marathon but trail run and did I mention -> in North Dakota! How cool? How lucky am I? I jumped onto the website and quickly saw that they had other distances, including 106. How enticing? A 106 mile trail that you could cover from point to point and considering my training and pain issues it would be doable perhaps simply because I could move so much slower. I quickly emailed our coordinator to ask for an extra day so that I might attempt this. Then I called my husband Dave to share the news and ask his opinion. I honestly expected him to remind me that I'd been struggling to manage my pain already and that this was a bad idea. I told him in my, "I already know the logical answer here" voice. He responded with "Cool baby, this is cool right? If you want to do it, you should do it." And so, I did.
As luck would have it I ran a 70+ mi week (if you count the walking miles which typically I don't but for slow going ultras walking can be a huge benefit) only 1 week prior. So it fit to have another high mileage week in before this attempt. At that time I really didn't know how my body would do out on the MDH and I hesitated to even consider a finish. I wanted to go and see as much as I could and I would simply do the best I could. Tuesday, July 2, I dug into my hamstring...desperate to get some release or pain control and I flared it, for 4 days I could hardly walk, I couldn't even attempt to run, every step felt like a knife. It's been like that so many times though it didn't really bother me, except that I lost an entire week of training and now had 3 weeks to be ready to run 100+ miles.
The following week I was "better" or back to my usual pain and I aimed for a 55 MI week. I also found, via reference, a great physical therapist who took the time to listen to my entire injury saga, evaluate my running gait, and get other team members on board to manage my issues. They, both of my PTs, supported my relatively idiotic plan to go run but we agreed that post MDH100 I would be a good patient, listen, learn and heal.
That week went fine and the next week I had one 22 ish mile overnight run with my friend Jackie and this was a huge confidence boost. My pain was manageable the whole run, I tested Rocktane by GU as a new nutrition tactic and tested out my brand new shoes. Prior to July 1, I was not nearly ready to consider my next ultra, in fact I'd just confirmed my dropping from Twisted Branch 100k which I hope I'll be attending in 2020. So, New shoes, New food, long run and a good friend... I hoped that'd be enough, because I was out on time. From that run I had 10 days to race day. So I planned to train hiking and shake out runs and hope for the best.
Last thing to note pre race wise is the course itself. Now the elevation isn't crazy, in fact on paper is the easiest ultra I'd attempt, but it was remote. There would be 3 aid stations, mile 25, 50 and 79. Any other support you might like, would be at Checkpoints A-I which were any road access locations in the trail. Most of these were 8-15 miles apart, there was a nice chunk between 68 and 79 where they were nice and close 4-6 miles apart. My only crew would be our team coordinator and I had no luck searching for a pacer in North Dakota. So this would be very much my own race. This was an exciting challenge!
July 25 arrived and most of the team was held up in Denver due to flight delay. We hung out and talked about our upcoming endeavors. Turns out there were 7 people attempting the 56 mile, but I was the only person doing the 106. The others planned for half or full marathon distances which were also long, 15 and 29 mile courses on trail. Not every marathon runner is trail runner nor do they want to be (after running this course - for the traditional road marathoner just standing at the start line took serious guts). We were all their for our own version of adventure. We eventually got into Dickinson, ND, checked in, ate dinner and crashed.
The next morning I learned our team coordinator, Chris, had brought one guy as back up support, Eric. Eric was basically assigned to be my crew (With 7 ppl doing the 56, which starts 50 miles ahead of my start line logistics were complicated, especially with 18 hrs to plan and neither Chris or Eric had ever crewed an ultra marathon). So I knew what I'd gotten into, I knew my support would need to feel as prepared as possible so I made a plan, sketched it out and we got the SAG vehicle ready.
Race day!!
Up and off to the start at 4am. Last minute routines and set up for my SAG and then it was off to the start. Nick, the Race Director welcomed us and shared his "Why"... It was touching and meaningful. He has been mountain biking this trail for years but when the funding disappeared the trail started to too. His personal refuge and place of peace was disappearing. He decided that couldn't happen and he and his wife developed the race series and 4 years ago they invited/ included trail runners. I felt so blessed to be even a tiny piece of something good, and I was about to see the entirety of the MDH, I wanted to see and experience what Nick was so passionate about.
After this Nick let us know the Little Mousouri river crossing would be 4.5' deep, meaning all SAG vehicles could not get from the previous checkpoint to the next AS directly, instead they'd need to drive around the entire area, roughly 2.5hrs to access the trail from the opposite side... So SAG wasn't going to Mile 50, we'd see them at 58 or checkpoint D.
0623ish we finally got started. We all went out hiking up but no one wanted to take the lead so I did and began trotting. I really wanted to take it slow so I was being really careful not leave the pack. Soon a couple other guys came up and not long after the eventual winner and first female. It was about 4 of us bouncing around upfront. It was getting hot fast! We climbed and descended some gentle and brief switch backs and then continued onto miles of open grassland. The sun streaming down, a 10" single track rut weaving along and constant wind that was only just more than a breeze. It was everything I dream about as a runner.
Mile 10, checkpoint A. This was our first stop and the only one until mile 25. I refilled my chest bottles and took my full 2L bladder. I chugged a soylent and pickle juice and grabbed a Little Debbie cake and went out, realizing quickly there after that we'd forgotten sunscreen. I ran for a while with a young guy who was going for his first 100. He admitted he was likely going too hard and just pacing off of others, but we had a good chat. I told him I was going to be slowing down soon with the heat I intended to save myself to enjoy the night. Not long after that I was baking, I decided I'd better get my hat out since it'd be a long while until I could get sunscreen on. So I took my pack off to get it out and put myself back together. About 5ish min later the trail was slightly less groomed and then a red PRIVATE fence, not the black lift gates of the MDH. Oh shoot! Where did I get off track? I started back toward the trail looking every where for the next 4'
marker, running at a 8:15 pace trying to remember not to be stupid and burn out over a lil wrong turn. Then anther runner turned right where I had clearly gone straight....(must have missed it putting my hat on), it was marked quite well.
I just kept moving, not knowing who all had passed while I'd gone exploring. About mile 20 I found a shrub and took to the shade for a minute. I thought if I stopped for pictures and took breaks in the shade it would help me to keep from thinking of this as a race, because I didn't want to race, I wanted to experience the trail, to take it all in. I heard voices a couple minutes later and so I got up to go run with these 2 guys. We took off hiking the ups and running the runnable, he was running solid though like 9:40s... It felt a bit too hard for me in the heat but I figured I'd stick with it to AS #1 (about 4 mile away at that point).
At the AS I couldn't believe how hot it was already, it wasn't even noon. We packed my bladder with ice and I drank pickle juice, soylent and walked with my tortilla, avocado and bacon wrap pushing myself to finish it before I started to run again. I kept on the same plan of run, walk but it was still hot, desert hot though. The wind dries your sweat so you're just running in an oven. So around mile 30 still 8 miles from the checkpoint I found just one tree with a single spot of shade. So again I sat. Only a couple minutes later Sylvia, a woman I'd emailed with prior to the race and hoped to run with, came up on me in. She asked if I was OK and I told her of course and got up to get some miles in with her. We enjoyed the next hour run walk hike run....but her walking was walking for me and not hiking. We were both feeling the heat of the day but some how in our hour together I felt like I recovered and took off down the trail. Got to checkpoint B and drank more of the same. I ate an MRE and drank as much liquid as I could. I also changed my socks which I'd never needed before but the grass was getting stuck inside the heel of my sock and rubbing. I'd already given up on my gators as I should have worn higher socks but I just don't like them. The next stretch would still be hot and another 8 miles long. I headed out my own and just kept rolling along, some clouds had come in and I was running pretty steadily. Checkpoint C was unremarkable, drank and dropped my bladder switching back to just my 2 x 18 Oz chest bottles. It was only 4 miles from here to the river. I caught up to Mark, Sylvia's husband and ran just ahead of him as I came to a deep mud "creek"...about 2 ft deep with thick mud, stagnant... But cool at least. From there it was only a mile or so to the river.
I'd been excited for the river all day, until I started to try and cross it. I couldn't keep my grounding against the current. I started to freak out a bit....I went back to the edge and waited for Mark, I told him I didn't think I could get across without getting pulled down river. He coached me across, we only lost 50ft but I've never struggled like that in water before. I was so grateful he was there. I pulled out my ziplock with my phone in it only to see a hole and brown water in the bag....F!!! Spent 3 min walking trying to suck river out of the charging port and get the case off...I couldn't exactly dry anything since I was totally soaked (which did feel good even if it invited the mosquitoes). I ran as efficiently as I could to AS#2 and dried my phone the inside of my headlamp and batteries. I ate 5 pieces of taffy and had both bottles filled with Tailwind. Then I took off down the trail.
At this point, the cooler end of daylight, it was time to cover ground and make up for time lost in the heat and 20 min in the river!! I was running smoothly and feeling very well. I was within 30 min of the leaders when I came into Checkpoint D about mile 58.
This is about where things start to blend together by the way. I know this was last checkpoint with just Eric and they actually thought they'd missed or lost me. I changed socks and shoes which post 9 mi of running on river gravel was a unique blessing.
As I left this checkpoint sunset was coming. Purple skies a very light rainbow stretched out in front of me. I came up the young guy who sadly was doing the painful drudge... The one you inevitably fall into when you go out too hard and use up your muscles early on (I know this look, the hike where you aimlessly follow your pacer and wish you'd listened better early on because I've done it plenty). I hung back with him and his pacer for a while just enjoying some company, even his pacer who would be switched out at the next checkpoint offered to pace me but it was time for me to get moving so I did. About a mile from the next checkpoint I decided to eat my MRE so I could be faster through checkpoint. Mid eating..."Rattle rattle hisssss".... I squeaked a girly scream and then headed around the trail giving the rattlesnake as much room as I could and then ran away fast!
Checkpoint E, Chris and Eric were waiting. I drank soylent and refilled. I was feeling tired but not yet ready to dig into my red bull. I didn't spend much time here. Eric told me that if I tried just a little I could likely catch up to #1, she was only 15 min ahead. I reminded him and myself that if that happens it'd be great but I didn't come to race, there's 38 more miles....we'll just see how it all goes. And off I went.
The next checkpoint was 6 miles off which was further than expected, felt like a long time alone in the dark. Chris mentioned he might have someone to run with me so I just wanted to get there. Finally checkpoint F. From F it was only 4 miles. A teammate who other than the MDH half marathon hadn't run trail and had never night run volunteered to come out. It was only 4 miles but it helped to break up the run. I was still moving well but it took effort now... You push to walk faster and faster until you accidentally run and then just don't stop for as long as you can. We made it checkpoint G but each stretch was feeling long. It was officially past my bedtime! From here though it would be 3 short miles to AS #3 mile 79ish. Off I went leaving the friendly faces behind and headed back into the darkness.
I don't remember much of this stretch, it was the same as the previous chunks of dark trail....the only views were the frogs on the trail and the MDH trail posts keeping you going! The descent to the AS was so fun, I always love switch backs. At the AS they had a little camp fire, soup, watermelon. It was pleasant. I spent too long here...the soup was so hot and I was trying to get it down ...probably should have stuck with soylent and kept rolling. The next chunk would be 12 miles. So I didn't worry too much about taking a few minutes before the longest stretch of darkness.
The night was getting hard. My stability was lessened so managing the same 10" rut was getting much harder so I was hiking hard but less running. Somewhere in the night there was the first of a few sink hole crossings: thick deep 8-10" mud some spots dry enough to hold you others not so much leading into 18" of muddy water and back out. Soaking your feet and filing your shoes and socks with tiny gravel. I also noticed that almost every step I took kicked dirt into the heel of my other shoe. I stopped to dump it out but my heels were already tender.
After pushing for an hour I turned on some music and just kept moving. Around mile 88 I heard this drumming. I couldn't tell how far it was or what it was. I turned off my music hoping for human life, peering into the darkness looking for car lights. I was lucky to never have a true low but this couple miles I was so desperate thinking I heard ppl. Turns out it was the sound of the fracking machines. I did get to checkpoint H but I was feeling defeated. I knew I'd lost time on that section. I changed my socks and shoes again. Ate one last MRE. I felt relatively restored and I had my red bull in one my bottles. Just one more long stretch (but really 2). From H to I was
estimated about 6 but it was closer to 9 miles.
Sunrise finally came and I had hoped to make up time in the day light but I was having muscle pain to my left medial knee that had been getting worse for hours but earlier in the run it was relieved by jogging...now though, there was no relief and it was getting sharper. There were 2, I think, more of those sink holes in this stretch so now the blister under my right ball of my foot was officially a blister and there was not much I could do at that point. Around 98 where I thought checkpoint I should have been I was feeling that anxiety around every turn hoping and wishing I saw my SAG vehicle and then I did finally but it was down and around, at least another half mile. I had 99.6 miles on my watch coming through checkpoint I and it was a personal goal at that point to record my 100 MI time and keep it under 24hrs . So I took nothing from my crew and just handed over my head lamps and headed for the finish. (100 MI was 23:23)
I hustled that last 7 miles as hard as I could. Motivation would wane and I would remind myself how much I'd like to be finished, because if you're not racing there's no hurry except that eventually you just want to sit down, dry your feet off and stop bending your knee that has been begging you to stop moving.
At 105mi Nick was biking up the trail, he asked how I was doing and I said, "feeling okay, like I've run about 105 miles"... A fist bump later and I was headed down the final stretch of the trail. I made the mistake of asking someone where the trail head was (when I was about 1/4 mi away from it in hindsight) she told me I had 2 miles to the finish line which I didn't show, but was crushing because by my watch I had just over a mile. I knew then I couldn't beat 25 hrs and slunked into a sad hike, I was mentally weak and I was limping...I would still push the last mile but the second to last would need to just be the best I could at the moment, it sounds silly in writing to try explain when your mind bottoms out and your goals slip away (that was my low it was late and very short but those moments are why you train and since I hadn't trained it was easy to tell myself it was okay). And then I saw it... Our bright neon yellow/green National Guard jacket...."$#!+!!" I thought.... She was wrong....I am less than half mile from them! So I ran, limped, jogged my way through the finish line. Wish I hadn't let that friendly estimate get into my head. Turns out #1 lady was only a few minutes up....perhaps we could have had an epic finish together.... But...oh well. I ran my own adventure. The whole 106 + miles of it. It was everything I could have hoped for.
I'm so grateful that I had that opportunity and the support from Chris and Eric and my teammates and the endless support of my husband who holds everything together when I'm away (which has just been too much lately). Ready to heal and have some summer with my family!!!
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